A Gem from the Past

A lovely friend has lent me one of her most precious books entitled 'Home and Health and Home Economics' it was written in 1880 by C. H. Fowler, D. D., and W. H. Puy, A., D. D. and published by Hithcock and Walden Cincinnati.


I am putting together a little book of recipes, household hints and humorous advice for a friend of ours who is getting married later this month and the book is a real gem - a veritable goldmine of information. However, I fear it would not be quite the book a modern young woman about to be married would look to purchase!


It has information on 'How to be a good wife' including such words of wisdom as 'cultivate the modesty and delicacy of your youth', and 'cultivate his better nature'! 'How to perpetuate your marriage', had advice on 'continue your courtship' - like cause produces like effects'; Keep step in mental development' - A tree that grows for forty years may take all the sunlight from a tree that stops growing at twenty.' 


I was particularly taken with the advice on being a good husband as well - 'Honour your wife: She must be exalted and never dethroned; 'suffer for your wife if need be' and 'help her bear her burdens' and 'be a gentleman as well as a husband'.


Mother-n-laws are also mentioned and being one I was interested to read that 'the criticism and joking about mother-in-law is course and indicates a low nature' and that husbands are reminded that 'But for your mother-in-law you wouldn't have been blessed with your wife'. 


There is a section on 'Training Children for Given Ends' that includes 'Training for Usefulness' - 'Train them to to wait upon themselves, instead of calling for someone to help them; to do helpful things. Some people think it is a sign of liberal condition to disregard all helpfulness; to appreciate an economy that saves; to understand that it is more blessed to give than receive' and with regard to wealth - 'teach them to earn it and to save it! One piece of advise that would have been really useful before the investment market crash is - 'Warn them of enterprises where they must bear all the risks, and others share the profits and 'warn them against the perils of being in  for wealth. Never run ahead of the hounds'.


It is also interesting to read in the section on 'Alcohol and Health' that they state that - 'The highest medical and chemical authorities now indorse the conclusion that alcohol is not a food but a poison, like opium, and a substance abhorrent to the human economy. . . that it excites the lower passions, predisposes the drinker to disease, and retards his recovery.  


That was written in 1880 and the government or society is still not really addressing the alcohol problem or its affects with relation to child abuse, domestic violence, drink driving and the cost to the health system and society in general.


'When will they ever learn?' 


It also has hints for employers such as 'Kindness to his employees is in keeping with his highest dignity; Pay honestly what he would expect. . .and what God requires; pay promptly. A man with little credit needs regular payment; Open the future to young men; encourage the worker in his work'.


Such words would be wise advice today me thinks! Especially with all the strikes and pay demands. 


So what started as a few words of advice from a bygone age for a little book to a Bride-to-Be became somewhat of a commentary on society today and how things change.


So to close I'll share these wee quotes with you. 



'Marriage, ultimately,is the practice of becoming passionate friends'.
- Harville Hendrix


'I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've 
experienced pain and bought jewellry'.
- Rita Rudner 


And these little gems were given to me to include in the wee book we are making and they are perfect!

'If you are having trouble sleeping at night, try rubbing a little lavender oil on the back of your neck. The lavender aroma will help you drift into a deep sleep.'

'Leave just a few of your dogs toys out for him and put the rest away. Swap them in a few weeks time and he'll think he has new toys'.

A Blessing 

This is my wish for you:
Comfort on difficult days,
Smiles when sadness intrudes,
Rainbows to follow the clouds,
Laughter to kiss your lips,
Sunsets to warm your heart,
Hugs when spirits sag,
Beauty for your eyes to see,
Friendships to brighten your being,
Faith so that you can believe,
Confidence for when you doubt,
Courage to know yourself,
Patience to accept the truth,
Love to complete your life.
- Anonymous